When I was praying so hard for my dad to seal the deal on the new job in Colorado, I realized that there may be some misunderstandings as to why this needed to happen for my family to be reunited, instead of me moving to North Dakota to be with Jonathon while he worked there. I'm not sure I've really had this conversation with many people, so I wanted explain it a little bit.
Jonathon and I had many conversations about how much we enjoy Colorado. I've lived other places, he's certainly lived other places, but we actually truly like Colorado. My parents discussed moving at one point, and I said, "Have fun! I'm staying here". I love that my family is 10 miles away, but there's a lot more to it than that. That being said, when Jon made the choice to leave the military life behind, we decided we'd settle in Colorado. At least for now. We never anticipated him leaving to work in another state.
My dad called 10 days after Jonathon got in from Korea offering him a job. At that point, we didn't have another job lined up, or another plan. We talked about it a lot before agreeing to live apart AGAIN. It just so happened that Jonathon ended up loving the job. Instead of "something for now", it became the job he wanted. I offered several times to move to North Dakota. Both he and my dad explained in detail that the town is not kid friendly. It isn't family friendly. The rent there was outrageous. The groceries are even more expensive. That wasn't the deciding factor. My dad kept saying "Just hang on. This isn't the end game". He worked a few deals that didn't fit quite right for what the guys needed and he waited it out.
This deal with this massive company is perfect. My dad has promoted Jonathon to his very own position, allowing him to work in an office instead of some field in North Dakota somewhere, which means he'd be able to move home and have a "normal" job. That type of work is great for some guys - and was great for my dad when he was young - but we have a family, and we need Jonathon home each night.
It may look like I was trying to get rid of Jon, or didn't care to live with him. I hate that it looks that way. I've been a "single" parent for 90% of Jackson's life. That's not easy. I want more than anything to live with my husband. My Grandma (who was probably the wisest person ever) lived away from my Grandpa for a majority of their marriage. She always said "distance does NOT make the heart grow fonder". She also said she had to build her own life so she wasn't lonely, disappointed or just waiting. I don't want that. Jonathon doesn't want that. We are active in our marriage and want the family life that we experience when he's home. My Grandpa (the other wisest person ever), when asked "How are you?", would always say, "If I complain, nobody listens". Aint that the truth? So we don't. We don't talk about how hard it is, or how frustrating it gets. It is what it is. This shouldn't be mistaken for indifference. It's hiding.
It's not easy missing out on everything when you don't live together. We missed Valentine's Day and both of our birthdays this year so far. Hopefully we can sneak Easter in.
By being brave and exposing all of this, I hope you'll join me in prayer that it's God's will to bring him back home with this new job. Thanks!
